A realization

Since moving here to Boston, I have had some great times. Saw a Red Sox game, a Celtics game, ate at some great restaurants, made some nice friends. But I realized that, through all this, I am still miserable. So I've been praying about it, as that's about all I can do. I've been waiting (im)patiently for an answer, and it just sort of hit me this morning as to why I'm here.
I left PA with the goal to "find myself" again, to get myself back to me. Before everything fell into place, I prayed about whether it was the right choice, and I still believe it was the right choice, but for different reasons than I thought. I thought moving here would be a start to a new life, a new and "better" me, when in reality, it was for me to see that everything I needed and wanted in life is in PA.
My friends and my family make up a HUGE part of who "I" am. I honestly thought that I could make new friends (which I have), because I had a few people here I was already friends with. Much like how I fell into the Astromonkey group 9 years ago, I figured I'd fall into a group here and be adopted in like it was nothing - and that didn't happen. I cherish the friendships I have made here, but most of them are more like acquaintances than anything. Couple that with falling in love with the one true friend I have here, and then having that end - I have no one now. That's lonely, and causes me to feel so much more miserable about everything.
So, come the end of my lease in June, I will be moving back to PA and will begin to focus on finding "me" where I left it - with my friends and family who love me and know me best. God has answered my prayers by showing me the support and love of all those who are 350 miles away from me, and by showing me the lack of support and love here. No offense to those friends I have here - I know I haven't reached out to many of you, and those that I have reached out to, I know you're here for me, but it's not the same as the friends who have known me for most of my life.
God led me here so I could learn this, this I know. I may not know what else will come, but I know that there's a light at the end of this tunnel, and I can now see that it's not a freight train barreling down on me, but God's light leading me through.